Boston Air Guitar Blog

Finally, the big show, the crowning acheivement of the 2015 US Air Guitar season - US National Finals were contested on Saturday, August 8th at the Hawthorne Theatre in Portland OR. Despite a truly dumb beer setup (the bar and drinking area was way at the back, all-ages [and thus boozeless] in the front), the show managed to go on and the air guitarists still managed to pull off their routines. Hey, you wouldn't host a swim meet without a pool, would you?

Portland, Oregon hosted this year's 2015 US Air Guitar Nationals weekend, which, by tradition, kicked off with the Dark Horse competition. This gathering of the "best of the rest" - people who didn't qualify through to the National Finals but still impressed on their journey there - is always really family-reunion night, a secret show that isn't publicized (so as not to take away attendance from the big show), where we can do the in-jokey things we might opt not to do on the more public stage since it's really for each other. Most years, it's the most fun night of the weekend. But while that happens, the serious contenders (and the less-likely-to-succeed crowd who are still committed to doing as well as they can) are doing their best and fighting for the last few spots in the Finals. Or, rather, the first few spots; dark horses always go first on the national stage. Either way, it's a lot of talent on a small stage, interspersed with untalented fools like yours truly to whom someone charitably gave another shot. 

The last semifinal/Conference Final of the 2015 US Air Guitar season was the Eastern Conference Final, in New York. I had the immense good fortune of competing in it, so a few of my memories are a blur due to being immediately before or after my turn. But we'll do what we can.

All right. Two Conference Finals down, two to go. The two in the bag were the bigger ones, pulling in competitors from all over and sending (now) 5 air guitarists on to Nationals. The remaining two, the Atlantic and Eastern Conference Finals, pull in a smaller but still dedicated slate of performers, and send 3 each. Today we're going to talk about the Atlantic semifinal, in Washington, DC, last Wednesday.

I know the Atlantic and Eastern Conference Finals just happened, but we need to talk about the Western Conference Finals in San Francisco first. Because, just like the Central Conference Finals, they were marred by scandal. This season, you guys. Well, no - the regular season went more or less smoothly. This post-season is the thing that's having dramatics. Maybe semifinals need to be put together by regular air guitarists as well, like qualifiers are, since everyone has proven that they can do it pretty well.

The Chicago semifinals, aka the US Air Guitar Central Conference Finals, took place Friday night at the Double Door (is it even possible not to call it the "Dumbledore"? I think not). They were streamed live, and they were rife with excitement. There was talent! There were costumed games of mistaken identity! There was even SCANDAL. I'll get to all of that in good time, but let me just say that if this is how the "postseason" is going to go, it's not going to be dull.

The other weekend (I'm catching up, you guys), LA had their qualifier, and by all accounts it was a killer show, filled with talent and - it's LA - total babes. More on the babe factor in a minute. Six String General piloted this plane, to great effect - having a whole airline theme which was fantastic. I've got him penciled in to win the "Relentless Commitment to the Bit" award this year. Maybe one year he will make my head explode by playing a song by Providence, RI's Six Star General. Also fun: a handful of competitors were part of a group traveling the world having once-in-a-lifetime experiences, and competitive air guitar was one option on their list. I hope they liked it enough to make it a more-than-once-in-a-lifetime experience!

Can I just begin by saying how much I love everyone for livestreaming their qualifier whenever possible? It enables me to write a real recap and not just piece it together from scraps on the internet... and it lets everyone see the glory. Today, I'm going to go back in time a minute to the Des Moines US Air Guitar Qualifier, which I skipped over in favor of talking about Boston while it was still fresh. Note: I realize I have skipped Nashville entirely. They were unable to livestream since it was both an air guitar competition and a burlesque show, so the burlesque part precluded livestreaming. I know who won - Noche! - but that's it. But Des Moines has video of the entire show. To save you a couple of hours, here's the recap!

It was a night of new beginnings. It was a night of a lot of things, to be fair, but there were new names, new performers, and new judges, and everyone came away happy and excited for next year. And, as an indication of a good show, there was plenty of rehashing how people did later on - should this competitor have gotten this score, how amazing was that move - so the crowd was engaged and thinking about the performances. I love that!

Portland is the home of the US Air Guitar Nationals this year, but first they have to have a qualifier. That went down on May 29th. Kara Picante hosted the event, and rocked the audience's world with an intro featuring herself and her "Hell Hussies" - bellydancing minions who, as in air guitar, told a whole story with just their bodies.